Weet-Bix Clan Goes for Guinness Gold

You probably grew up thinking you were a Weet-Bix kid, but a group of Year 11 larrikins have taken it to the next level. We sat down with the boys striving to make history and become the first ever official Guinness holders of the fastest time for 6-8 men to consume a 1.4 kg value pack of Weet-Bix.

For Sam Jones, Sam Pascoe, Jack Ronnfeldt, Tom Warren and Dion Robert, the love of Weet-Bix came from an early introduction to the legendary breakfast cereal. Jones began his journey eating Weet-Bix most mornings as a young boy because of the “five-star health rating” and has since fallen in love. Pascoe, the other Sam, was “raised on Weet-Bix”. Warren has “always been a Weet-Bix kid” and “can’t remember eating anything else”. To Ronnfeldt, “Weet-Bix brings us all together”.

Weet-Bix is more than just a breakfast cereal to Jones, and means more than just the five-star health rating. The quality cereal biscuits serve as a symbol. Put simply, the boys thrive on the Australian Weet-Bix culture.

The dream of securing a Guinness World Record stemmed from a heroic desire to save this year’s CHAC’s Got Talent, which was under threat of being cancelled due to a lack of participating acts. When brainstorming acts to perform, Ronnfeldt suggested they “go up there and eat Weet-Bix on the stage” and the revolution was born.

The group are currently undergoing regular training sessions and try outs to find who can handle the most fibre. In true CHAC spirit, the boys all coach each other and the friendly competition encourages each champion to reach their personal best. Warren’s claim to fame is nine Bix in three minutes.

While there is no one way to eat Weet-Bix, most of the boys go for 9 Weet-Bix in one sitting – 16 for a personal best – with milk and honey. Most agreed that warm Weet-Bix is an ‘abysmal way’ to do your Weet-Bix, but brave Tom Warren stood against the crowd, confessing that he does in fact eat warm Weet-Bix in the brutal Queensland winter. On a frosty morning, Tom limits himself to five or so Weet-Bix and heats the milk up using a milk warmer intended for coffee. On the other hand, Sam Jones has always had an uncanny reluctance to digest any form of fruit, and as such will never add the extra source of sugar and fibre to complete his bowl. Ronnfeldt has established a strong technique and “eats every single Weet-Bix brick the same way – three neat spoonfuls every time”. Pascoe’s regular strategy is to “put them in [his] mouth and chew”, a seemingly common approach amongst the young lads.

A key aspect of Weet-Bix eating is the precise Weet-Bix to milk ratio. Tom Warren believes, “you can’t buy it, you can’t teach it, you just gotta know it”. The gift of finding the perfect amount of milk for the Weet-Bix brick to soak up without being too soggy or too hard is can only be found through intense training and a true love for the Australian breakfast icon. Dion Robert proved his lactose intolerance does not in fact render him the weakest link, even going so far as to declare it an advantage as it provides greater “real estate in [his] stomach”, due to the lack of density and significant macronutrients in his beloved Unsweetened Almond milk. What a champ. Allegedly, Dion is the only one who regularly performs bicep curls to maintain the fitness required. As Jones says, “Dion’s got those massive arms and it’s all from Weet-Bix”.

As for future plans? The champions plan on increasing their Weet-Bix intake by one each year. At 16 years, they’re currently eating their age and want to be eating “40 a day by the time they’re 40”. There are doubts as to whether the emerging competition would make it to Tokyo for the 2020 Olympics, but this proves no buffer, as to these champions, “it’s an art form.” In fact, Tom hopes Weet-Bix eating “might be put in the GOMA”. The boys are also looking at sponsorships from Weet-Bix, Red Bull and Maleny’s Milk. Pascoe plans to “just ask Melaney’s to give [them] some milk” while Warren simply wants a “certificate that says Red Bull has sponsored [them]”, no money required.

Sam Jones has no fear in securing their world records as “there is no competition”. However, Pascoe believes that after they “secure the world record [they’re] going to inspire a young generation of Weet-Bix eaters”. To Tom, “this is the legacy [they] want to leave”. The biggest threat to their success? Sultana Bran. In the words of Sam Pascoe himself, “I hate when you say sultana bran”.

So the question remains, how many Weet-Bix do you do?